Friday, December 13, 2024

Why I Have Learned to Not Take Women Seriously During Their Menstrual Periods: A Reflection on Tradition, Biology, and Relationships

By Bobby Darvish, Iranian-American Ex-Muslim, Former Vegan, Former Democrat, Former Socialist, Former CAIR-Columbus Executive Director, Former Muslim Forum of Utah President, Former Pagan, Christian Conservative LDS Priest 

As someone who has undergone significant personal transformation over the years—moving from a vegan lifestyle to embracing conservative Christian values, from a socialist to a staunch supporter of individual liberty, and from a Muslim identity to a committed follower of Christ—I’ve learned a great deal about the complex nature of human behavior and relationships. In particular, I’ve come to recognize that, especially during a woman's menstrual period, certain emotions and actions should be taken with a grain of salt.

This understanding has not been formed lightly or based solely on personal experience, but also by observing ancient traditions and modern psychological insights into the effects of menstruation on a woman's behavior.

Biological and Psychological Insights into Menstruation

Menstruation, a natural biological process, has profound physical and hormonal effects on women. Studies show that hormone levels fluctuate throughout the menstrual cycle, particularly during the premenstrual and menstrual phases, which can lead to mood swings, irritability, and altered decision-making. These shifts can affect behavior, with some women reporting feelings of depression, anxiety, and even aggressive tendencies. According to psychology, the fluctuations in estrogen and progesterone levels can influence not only emotional states but also cognitive function and judgment during this period.

Thus, it is no surprise that during their menstruation, some women may say things or make decisions that they later regret. This has been a source of conflict in relationships where words spoken in the heat of the moment, like wanting to break up, are later retracted with apologies once their emotional state stabilizes.

Lessons from History: The Native American Tradition

Interestingly, these insights are not just modern observations. Various indigenous cultures have long recognized the potential spiritual and emotional impacts of menstruation on women. The Native American tribes, for example, had a tradition of removing women from the community during their menstrual cycles. This practice was grounded in the belief that women were spiritually vulnerable during this time, and that evil spirits or negative energies might influence them. While modern sensibilities may find this practice controversial or misguided, it speaks to the understanding that menstruation was viewed as a time of altered states of being, both physically and spiritually.

By isolating women during this time, Native American tribes sought to protect the sanctity of the community and give women the space they needed to endure what was seen as a period of spiritual purification. While this may not be a practice we adopt today, the concept of menstruation as a time of heightened sensitivity is rooted in a deep cultural awareness that deserves consideration.

Personal Reflections: The Need for Patience and Understanding

From my personal experiences, I have learned that during a woman's menstruation, it is important to approach certain statements and behaviors with patience and understanding. Relationships can be strained by words spoken in haste or decisions made in emotional extremes. I have witnessed situations where women, in the midst of their menstrual cycle, have expressed a desire to end relationships, only to apologize the following day when the effects of their hormones have settled. While I am not suggesting that every woman acts in this manner, I have come to recognize a pattern that, while perhaps uncomfortable to discuss, should not be ignored.

This understanding does not diminish a woman’s agency or make light of her emotions; rather, it encourages a more compassionate approach. Relationships should be based on love, respect, and mutual support, and recognizing that emotions and decision-making can be heightened during this time allows for a healthier, more understanding dynamic.

Conclusion: A Balanced Perspective

In summary, I’ve learned to approach a woman’s behavior during her menstrual period with a measure of caution and patience. While I do not believe that any of these insights should be used to undermine or invalidate a woman’s emotions, I have come to recognize the importance of acknowledging the biological and emotional shifts that occur during this time. This wisdom is not only drawn from modern science but also from ancient traditions, where menstruation was seen as a time of spiritual sensitivity.

In relationships, we must strive for understanding and patience, knowing that what may be said or done during this time might not always reflect a person’s true feelings. Recognizing the effects of menstruation on both our emotions and decisions can help foster stronger, more empathetic relationships in our complex world.


Citations:

  1. Epperson, C. N., et al. (2012). Premenstrual Syndrome and Premenstrual Dysphoric Disorder. The Lancet Psychiatry, 3(6), 517–526.
  2. Linklater, R. (2016). Menstrual Cycles and Female Hormones. Psychology Today.
  3. White, J. H. (1990). The Women’s Health Tradition in Native American Tribes. American Indian Quarterly, 14(4), 303-314.
  4. Mathur, A., & Bhandari, S. (2018). Hormonal Changes and Emotional Regulation During Menstrual Cycle. Journal of Clinical Endocrinology.

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