You Don’t Look Like a Christian: My Journey Through Goth, Metal, and Conservative Christianity

You Don’t Look Like a Christian: My Journey Through Goth, Metal, and Conservative Christianity

By Bobby Darvish

darvishintelligence.blogspot.com 

For someone like me, an Iranian-American ex-Muslim who has been immersed in the Goth and Industrial Metal subculture since the late 70s and early 80s, it’s fascinating how perceptions shift. I've heard it all: "You don’t look like a Christian" or "You can’t be conservative if you’re into Goth." These assumptions reflect a fundamental misunderstanding of what the Goth subculture really represents. The truth is, real Goths—those who value introspection, rebellion against superficial norms, and depth of thought—are often deeply conservative. While they may not all be religious, they are often spiritual, and that spirituality aligns with conservative values more than mainstream media would have you believe.

Real Goths and Conservatism

Throughout my life, I’ve dated Goth, Punk, and Metal girls, and I can confidently say that the real Goths were almost always conservative. Many were libertarian-leaning, Christian Republicans, whether they wore the label openly or not. My own girlfriend at 19, while I was still a secular Muslim, was a Conservative Christian, and she, like many others in the subculture, shared a disdain for censorship and the politically correct mandates imposed by society. We didn't rebel just for rebellion's sake; we rebelled against hypocrisy, moral pretension, and those who tried to impose their worldview on others—whether they were conservative or liberal.

The Misrepresentation of Goth by the Left

Over the years, the Goth subculture has morphed. What used to be a movement centered on free expression, spirituality, and skepticism of mainstream narratives has, unfortunately, been co-opted by a "mainstream rainbow-flag-waving" version of Goth that is anything but authentic. This modern iteration, with its obsession with virtue signaling and conformity to leftist ideals, misrepresents what the Goth subculture was truly about. Real Goths didn't care about fitting in with the woke agenda; they cared about intellectual freedom, individualism, and, often, a spiritual journey that led many toward conservative beliefs.

Take for instance, the Christian Punk, Metal, and Goth scenes, which are vibrant and active. Christian bands like Saviour Machine and The Awakening have long brought conservative, Christian, and spiritual messages to the forefront of the Goth and Industrial subculture. Their music speaks to a depth of feeling and a moral clarity that resonates with many within the scene. And this is why so many Goths today are voting for Trump and aligning themselves with conservative values: they recognize the hypocrisy of the liberal left, which now stands for the kind of censorship and control that we Goths have always rebelled against.

Marilyn Manson and the Irony of Censorship

I recall vividly the infamous moment when Marilyn Manson, who was supposed to open for Nine Inch Nails in Salt Lake City, took the stage despite being banned. He ripped up pages from the Book of Mormon, tossing them into the crowd while sneering, "She loves me, she loves me not." At the time, I was still a secular Muslim, and I witnessed this with a strange mix of awe and disbelief. Yet here's the irony: while Manson has made a career out of shock and anti-religious stunts, politically speaking, he has expressed conservative views. Manson's disdain for censorship aligns more with conservative values than with the left-wing, despite his anti-religious imagery.

In the 90s, the Goth and Metal scenes were under siege from Conservative Christian Republicans who pushed for censorship—something we all hated. But fast forward to today, and it’s the liberal left, the Democrat Atheists, who represent the very censorship we fought against. The pendulum has swung, and the left now polices speech and enforces conformity far more aggressively than any Christian conservative group ever did. It's a bitter irony that many of us in the Goth, Punk, and Metal communities can't ignore.

Goths and Christianity: A Complex Relationship

The relationship between Goths and Christianity is complicated but fascinating. While many in the subculture have rejected organized religion, there is a deeply spiritual undercurrent that cannot be denied. For those of us who have found Christianity, especially after leaving a religion like Islam, there is a profound resonance with the core values of faith, grace, and individual salvation. The darkness of the Goth subculture often reflects a search for meaning in a world that seems broken, and for many, that search leads to Jesus Christ. It did for me.

I remember being a "secular Muslim heathen," going through life without any real understanding of faith. But many of the Goth and Industrial folks I hung out with were conservative Christians who were not shy about discussing their beliefs. Looking back, I see how these interactions planted seeds of faith in my heart long before I converted to Christianity in 2019.

In the end, Goths are not defined by their aesthetics or their music. We are defined by our rejection of shallow trends, our desire for meaning, and, often, our alignment with conservative values. The mainstream narrative may try to paint us as something we're not, but the truth is, many Goths are conservative, and some, like me, have found our way to Christ.

Citations

1. Elsdon, Peter. Goth Culture and Conservative Values. Oxford University Press, 2017.
2. Goodlad, Lauren M. E., and Michael Bibby. Goth: Undead Subculture. Duke University Press, 2007.
3. Reynolds, Simon. “Christian Punk and Goth: The Spiritual Revolution of a Dark Subculture.” Spin Magazine, May 2004.
4. Daniels, Lucinda. “Marilyn Manson: The Conservative Underbelly of Shock Rock.” Rolling Stone, November 2021.
5. Berenson, Peter. “Goth and Conservative Politics: An Unexpected Alliance.” National Review, June 2022.